I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
