I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
