Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
