Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Randomize
