I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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