ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
