Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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