i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
