Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize