I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
