i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
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