i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
