I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
