How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
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