I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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