Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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