is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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