You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Do you have feelings for this penis?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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