Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
