so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Holy sore nipples Batman
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
