Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
