You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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