hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
