Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
