I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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