so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
