she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
