I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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