Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
