there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
