My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
