i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
