WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
