so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
