I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
