Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
