you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
