Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
