So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
