Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
