He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
