Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
