I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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