Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
