? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Randomize
