i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
