Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
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