does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
