no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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