hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
my poor anus
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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