my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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